Tag Archives: helping kids with social anxiety

My Christmas List

 

Christmas! The very word brings joy to our hearts. No matter how we may dread the rush, the long Christmas lists for gifts and cards to be bought and given–when Christmas Day comes there is still the same warm feeling we had as children, the same warmth that enfolds our hearts and our homes.”
~ Joan Winmill Brown, American author and editor.

I have had one too many Christmases spent either in the hospital with my sick parents or seeing my children sick on Christmas Day. I have been pondering what I’d really like to get for Christmas. What things would I enjoy that I wouldn’t necessarily purchase for myself. So here it is my Christmas wish.

  • That all of us are healthy but especially on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day
  • That we as a family can enjoy some quality time where we can enjoy the laughter of our children and re-connect as a family
  • To have all four of us in our pajamas watching a Christmas movie while snuggled together on the couch (an exceptionally blustery day would help)
  • Someone else to cook dinner without leaving a trail of dishes that take a day to clean up
  • Skating in the backyard skating rink (not quite ready yet)
  • A box of turtles or a Tobelerone bar that is ALL for me! So if it takes me 10 days to eat it so be it
  • For us all to have a good rest

Ehren took the day off of school today. He claims he wasn’t feeling very well this morning and I don’t doubt it. He still have issues that are unresolved and they keep trickling out like a leaky faucet. This morning he explained how Sydney really upsets him sometimes because she keeps repeating herself and making him feel bad. He has only had one play date and Sydney has had two and this morning at the table Sydney kept saying she’s had two and wants more. When we dropped her off at school and yes this morning was just as bad as yesterday. She still planted her feet on the ground and this morning she actually hit me in the arm when I tried to take her hand. Ehren stood by and watched and when she went into school with the teacher he said, “Poor Sydney. Why is she so upset?”. We talked on the walk home about how she has such anxiety that she needs to reaffirm those things that she’s done. Take playdates for example. She just needs to keep reminding herself that she in fact has friends and her friends like her and she reminds herself about what a great time she’s had when she’s brought her friends home. She doesn’t mean to rub it in Ehren’s face.

I explained that she just needs some extra encouragment because like today she feels like she can’t do things. I told him he was a strong boy and had anxiety too but has managed to beat the anxiety monster and can control his feelings and that’s exactly what we’re trying to do with Sydney.

Ehren and I discussed making a booklet about his sister and her anxiety and I think it’s a great idea. Both a therapy for him and for me with the end result perhaps helping everyone who has a brother or sister with anxiety.

Thank goodness it’s friday because when Sydney comes home tonight and asks, “Can we sleep in tomorrow?” at least I can say, “yes!”.

The strength of my marriage

Friedrich Nietzsche:
It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.

Dave and I have seem some very hard times. When my mother was really sick we spent more time apart than together. Shortly after I had Sydney we spent more time disagreeing and finding ourselves as a family than happy evenings all gathered at the table. We’ve had our share of arguements over valid things and things that circumstance just kept slapping us in the face with that looking back on seem really quite silly. There were times when I didn’t think our marriage would stand the test of time. We’ve had so many things pulling us each and every way.

It is ironic that I found the quote about marriage and friendship because I think despite all of our challenges the one thing that’s remained a constant in our marriage is that we are very good friends. Sounds silly in some ways really but it’s the most important thing. We don’t get much of a chance to go out together so when we do it’s such a treat! Time for us is just as important as time with the kids and time alone but so often gets neglected. So tomorrow the kids are being watched by some very special people in their lives and I get a chance to go out with my best friend, without fear of our conversation being interuppted. Let’s hope we still have something to talk about!

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