Call me totally sentimental, call me over emotional but I have to admit that the last day of school is always full of so much emotion. I can’t believe how quickly the year has gone by. It just seems like yesterday that we were meeting Sydney’s teacher and figuring out how the new dynamic will work. Sydney’s teacher has stuck by her through good days and bad, through tears and laughter and now as with everything in life we must make a change. Wow…what a year! Here are some of the highlights.
A few weeks ago Sydney had an oral presentation due for her social studies class. “Pumpkin – Fruit or Vegetable?” Her teacher was unable to be in the classroom to see all of the presentations so she told the class that she would be videotaping some of them. We all know how completely unimpressed and frustrating pictures and video are for Sydney. Well, she watched a few other presentations and then decided that she was ready. She told the social studies teacher that she was ready to go and she wanted to present next. Everything happened pretty quickly in order to make sure that she didn’t have any second thoughts and do you know how incredible it was?
- She stood in front of the WHOLE class and actually didn’t say anything but she held her paper up and followed along.
- She did not look down and cringe
- She did not put her hands to her face to hide herself
- She even pointed out to her friend that she had missed a part
- During question and answer period she picked out individual classmates that had questions
She did a presentation and the buzz around the school was beyond words. Everyone who knows Sydney was thrilled for her accomplishment and who wouldn’t be. By the end of last year we were lucky to have built her confidence up to presenting to one friend. That was it and look at her now.
In the last few months in typical Sydney tradition she has flourished. Just the other day we were in the Walmart Sydney spotted a classmate of her’s clear across the parking lot. Her big brother encouraged her to yell over to her to get her attention. Last year that idea would have been met promptly with a look of “not a chance” meets an “are you kidding I couldn’t do that”. So what does Sydney do? She yells in her loudest voice for her classmate. She doesn’t hear Sydney’s call so I suggested to do it again and without hesitation she yells and this time she does hear Sydney and the smile on Sydney’s face was priceless. They both waved to each other and for the next 20 minutes we are serenaded with the phrase, “I can’t believe that we saw her here at Walmart”. What music to our ears and what an accomplishment. What people need to realize is that this for her is amazing. From what I heard from her teacher and others today was that in the last little while that socially she is gaining confidence and is beginning to really interact with others. How amazing is that?
So at the end of the school year how can I not be emotional. Here is what my village looks like:
The teacher – who has taken the time to get to know Sydney and I mean really know Sydney. She has listened to her needs, she has made her feel comfortable and confident. She has allowed her to cry, she has walked with her when she needed a break and she has calmed her fears when the world just felt WAY to big.
The Educational Assistants & Special Education Resource Teachers – Sydney has had the pleasure of working some amazing people who have encouraged her to venture out of her shell and take a chance. They have encouraged and embraced every little step. From throwing a ball in the gym, to working through this years EQAO tests. They too have learned how Sydney ticks and been there every step of the way.
The Principle and Vice-Principle – These people make the school tick and although they have to be aware of 850 odd students they know who Sydney is and they accept that sometimes things can be too much for her. Just like everyone else they aren’t sure when things will trigger her off and what strategy will work for her but they see her for the caring, hard working, beautiful soul that Sydney is. Just today I was told by a number of people that the girl Sydney is today is so different than at the beginning of the year and they all can not be happier.
The Youth and Child worker – It’s all about challenging Sydney just a little bit to move through those things that she really doesn’t want to do but doing it in a way that let’s Sydney know that “she can do it” and she will and she does. We unfortunately lost our Youth and Child worker earlier this year but she always will hold a very special place in Sydney’s heart. Hopefully for Grade 4 she’ll be back because we’ve made it tradition that she help to get Sydney to sit in the chair for picture day and inevitably she’s in the picture with her. That alone speaks volumes as to the things that certain people will do for my child. Not a day goes by that I don’t think I am truly blessed to have her in our lives.
The Speech and Language Therapist – I think back to years ago when we had Sydney in Speech and Language therapy and I remember distinctly Sydney saying to me with teeth clenched in pure anger, “If she wants to see me she can come to my house because I’m never coming here again”. Well this year when I mentioned Mrs. M coming to see her it was greeted with a huge smile and “I love seeing Mrs. M because she always plays really fun games with me and helps me talk better. But I really like that she plays games with me.” She has given Sydney the confidence to know that you can make mistakes and that sometimes we need to give our mouths a little help by trying some sounds over and over again and that’s okay.
The Kids – It’s so hard for the other kids to understand the mood swings, the crying, the inability to reply to question, the lack of social interaction. It’s all about coming back time and time again and being persistent because you never know when one day she will respond. This class although it was a 3/4 split and we weren’t sure how it would go the class ended up to be exactly what Sydney needed and Sydney responded wonderfully to them all. She had the 6 Grade 3′s that encouraged and engaged her and by the end of the year she was talking to everyone in the class. Seeking other kids out to sit with on the carpet and overall the dynamic was perfect. She came home so many nights talking about her day. Remember what I always advocate about fighting the anxiety monster; it takes just a few good experiences to put in your memory bank and when things come along you have something concrete to say, “Hey I’ve done that before and it was good!”. Thus the reason why we were so happy when the other night at Walmart she yelled for the other girl. It’s all about making connections and moving out of old patterns to realize the beauty of the world out there.
Without pushing but encouragement she will find her way.
Without harsh words but with concern she will find her voice.
Without punishment but understanding she will soar.
This year that is exactly what she did in her own time, with her village surrounding her.
Always learning, always engaged, always trying her absolute best.
I don’t think that anyone can ever be too grateful, or that you can be too appreciative of others and what all of these people do for Sydney and all the other kids out there. Just like everything else being in the education field is a choice and a profession but the human part of it is that everyone sees her for who she is and what she needs and her needs change and we all adapt and brainstorm strategies because in the end we all want the same thing…we all want her to succeed. Along the way through the tears and the jitters and the breakdowns and the stumbles we all get to revel in the smiles and the laughter and the sweet sounds of success; the reading that has improved, the presentation that she delivered, the ball that she finally threw to the EA while in gym. It all adds up to what Sydney said today. At the end of the day, under the bright June sun on the very last day of school my daughter looked at me with the biggest smile ever and said, “My bucket is full”… meaning her bucket of happiness is bubbling over and she couldn’t have been more content, self-assured, hopeful and peaceful. That’s what Grade 3 was all about!
